7 Tips To Improve Your Online Dating Profile Photo(s)

Increase your chances of meeting that special someone.

First let’s make one thing perfectly clear, almost ANY photo is better than none. It’s a fact that better than 50% of online daters won’t even look at profiles without any pictures. And of those that will- they are 7 to 10 times more likely to respond to a profile that has a picture than one that doesn’t!

Today’s inexpensive digital cameras make it possible for you to take a good picture. But they can’t correct the aesthetics; all they can do is capture the image you provide. Even Denzel Washington looks ordinary (if such is possible) when the lighting is wrong or the pose is unflattering.

Here are some tips that you can put to use today!

1. Don’t look rigid

Have a good friend be the photographer. Try to forget about the fact that they’re taking your picture and just chat. While you’re interacting like you usually would your friend can just keep clicking away. Pet the dog, stroke the cat, pick up a pan whatever. Digital pictures cost nothing! Also, try not to keep your hands right by your sides. Instead, clasp them in the front or in the back, or hold on to your eyeglasses to help relax your body.

2. Minimize wrinkles and avoid shiny skin.

Foundation for women and translucent powder for men are quick fixes. However the real secret is lighting. To get as much light on your face as possible pose near the closest light source, like a window if your indoors. Always use a flash, both inside and outside – the flash will illuminate your skin and help hide imperfections. Make the most of your scenery. Photographs taken on a white sandy beach or a snow-covered surface tend to be more flattering because the reflective qualities of those surfaces help de-emphasize wrinkles and pockmarks. Of course, some scenery is just not practical for online dating profiles, but you understand what we’re saying.

3. Avoid shooting a double chin

Professional photographers will tell you to pay attention to the camera position. If the lens is at your eye level or above, you’re in the right frame. If the lens is below your eye level, then you run the risk of looking like you have an extra chin. One trick is to bend down so you’re at least on an even plane with the photographer (assuming it’s not a full-body photo). If you’re significantly taller than the photographer, sit in a chair and look up toward the camera. Or have the photographer stand on a chair.

4. Avoid a fake smile

The best way to avoid a fake smile is not to have one. Have your photographer friend say something that you think is funny. Or think about a joke you know that makes you laugh and tell it to yourself. Lastly, some models suggest that if you’re self-conscious or critical of your smile, practicing before a photo shoot can be helpful.

5. Avoid “red eye”

Glance at a lamp or the nearest light source right before the photo is taken. This is because red-eye usually occurs in a dim room when the irises have opened up so much that the retinas, which are red with blood vessels, light up when the flash hits them. Glancing at a light source helps because when the pupils affix on something bright, they shrink, reducing the potential for red-eye.

6. Crop your photo

Cropping your photo is easy. Just about every computer has editing software that lets you crop, correct color and more. Get rid of the background and focus the picture on what’s important… you!

7. Highlight your skin tones

Wearing colors that flatter your complexion reduces your risk of looking drab and brighten your overall look. If you have warm skin tones, go with colors in the orange and red families, like coral. If you have a cool complexion, try bluish and violet colors.

What you have here are some simple tips to make yourself as attractive as possible. A good quality, recent photograph is the best strategy. So, choose the best camera you can, choose the colors that convey both the mood and personality you want and note the simple guidelines above to avoid unflattering poses. And, be sure to post more than one picture. Following these suggestions will help get you noticed!

 

How to Say NO!

Dating Advice for Urban Christians

When it is the time to say ‘No’ to a person whom you don’t like, you feel it really tough. Sometimes, a prospective partner wants you take the relationship further, but you don’t want to. If you fail to say ‘no’ right now, the task becomes difficult later on. Leaving that person later on may not become possible. So, it is important to learn not only how to love but also how to leave.

Be Clear In What You Say

If your date wants to see you again after the first date, clearly tell him/her about your feelings. But do it in a polite and direct manner. Thank your date for a nice and lovely evening. Also, make it clear that you’d rather not take the situation any further. You have to be persistent before he or she gets the message.

Be Sensible In Dealing

If your date puts pressure on you to tell the reasons why you not prefer a go out with them, you need to be very tactful in dealing with such situations. You may need to be rude if your date is horrendous; in this case you might close the deal in the beginning itself. But, if your date is not bad and just not meeting your criterion, you need not be rude.

Give An Honest Explanation

When you say no, don’t try to blame yourself or the other for the breakup. You may do it to convince the other person and avoid hurting him or her. Instead you can give some honest opinion or explanation. Simply say, “I don’t think our relationship works well”.

Don’t Make Offers That Won’t Work

When you make offers be sure that you keep them. Otherwise they cause embarrassment to the other person. If you say, “I’ll phone you” or “We will meet again”, your date will be full of hope and expectation. If you never call again or meet again it will let him/her down. Also, don’t give a false phone number. It’s better not to give a number at all.

Don’t Overreact

If your date responds badly to your rejection, don’t overreact. Your date might get hurt with your rejection and send you a long email pointing your faults or sends a rambling phone message. Don’t think he or she is reflecting badly on your character. Be cool and try to understand the situation. End It In A Polite Manner

Even after your rejection ff your date continues to send text messages or mails, reply in a neutral, polite way. If the emails still continue, ignore them. The same can be done with phone calls. You can answer the first one in a polite way, but you need not answer any subsequent calls.

Reject Friendship Hand

If your rejected date says he or she want to be your friend, politely decline that offer. Most of the times it is an attempt to renew your relationship. Remember – dating is meant to find a partner not a friend. But if you feel that the other person is genuine you can think about that option.

Just follow the above advice on how to say ‘no’ to your dating partner and end any relationship with a happy note with no trauma later on.

Recommended Reading

 

When I Say No, I Feel Guilty
Manual J Smith PHD

To date over 2 million people have bought this book and learned how to say No without feeling guilty. A great book that will help you get the most out of life by teaching you techniques for being assertive.

Highlight The Real You!

Lord knows how hard it can be to summarize oneself in just a few words. Let’s face it, it’s not easy to write a profile that is both captivating and concise. That’s why we thought we’d put together this little “How To” on writing an appealing profile.

Tips to make your profile highlight the real you and give a glimpse into your personality. as well as captivate and get responses from the right people!

Be Casual

When you sit down to write your profile imagine that you just casually met someone at your favorite café, coffee shop or a friend’s party. Imagine what you’re telling them about yourself.

Your dating profile is just an online extension of that chance meeting.

Potential Mates want to know the same things, give them the most relaxed you.

Make your 200-250 words work for you. Keep your profile fun and interesting by mixing concrete info about yourself with a dash of humor and wit. Use 150-200 words to discuss yourself, and 50-100 words describing the person you are looking for. Be as charismatic and exciting as you are in person.

Be Inviting

Remember, this is a first conversation with someone you’re very interested in. Talk about the places where you have lived and cultures you have been exposed to. This will spark dialogue with people who either share your experiences or want to know more about them. People are always interested in other places and cultures. Having lived internationally will definitely intrigue your faith mate. Offer a chance to find a connection through your genealogy (e.g My family was orignally from the Deep South). Similarly, speaking a foreign language can attract attention.

If you’re new to your city, mention that. New faces are always intriguing. Aren’t you usually eager to play tourist guide? They can also ease your settling process; even if no sparks fly, you can always make some good friends. You might even meet someone else new to the area and you two can discover it together.

Give a brief synopsis of schools you have attended, jobs you have held, and your long-term career goals. Don’t we usually talk about we do? It makes sense to write about in a dating profile.

If you have children, share a little about them. They are an important part of your life so don’t leave them out. Avoid telling too much, but you want to come across as a normal parent so talk about their ages, and whether or not they live with you. (Don’t use this space to talk a lot about them… your potential partner is more interested in YOU)

Be Real

Tell your faith mate what you do for fun. Use your imagination; take the liberty to be witty and intriguing. State your social preferences: go out or stay in? Many friends or a small circle? Bowling, movies, or skiing? Pets or no pets? Give enough of a glimpse into your social life to make your readers want to join you.

Be clear and fair to yourself when talking about whom you want to meet. State your requirements and preferences without limiting yourself unnecessarily. If women with children are out, say so. If you do not want to go out with club-hoppers, mention it clearly in your profile. Only restrict potential mates here with items that you are very sure you absolutely want or do not want in a potential partner. Share whether you are looking for a stable relationship or if you are just looking to meet someone to hang out with to see how things go from there.

All in all, keep it real. Being honest about who you are and what you want will save you a lot of time and effort guide you right to your faith mate.

Check Out This Book:

World Wide Search: The Savvy Christian’s Guide to Online Dating
By Cheryl Green

In today’s fast-paced world, singles are turning to the Internet in the hopes of finding a relationship that goes deeper than superficial conversation. With so much happening online, how can you know the best place to start and how to proceed?

The search for a special relationship via the Internet holds great promise, but also significant risk. Fortunately, World Wide Search guides you in the right direction, makes you aware of the dangers, and prepares you to enjoy the unique blessings of dating online. Whether you are new to online dating or simply looking for ways to improve your approach, this is the supportive, trustworthy guide you need to help you succeed as you seek “the one” online.

Have Fun.. Be Safe… Be Smart

What to DO and Not To DO when using an online dating program.

FaithMate.com offers a fun, safe environment that gives YOU control over your dating experience, but the following tips can help to ensure a fun, safe experience:

• DO guard your financial information and beware of solicitation: You’re on FaithMate.com for dating not for financial advice or charitable contributions. Also, notify us immediately if another member asks for money, attempts to sell any merchandise or service, or sends you links to a pay-to-view site or instructions about how to call a 1-900 number.
• DO protect your identity: Don’t share your real name, personal phone numbers, or any other identifying information while Instant Messaging or emailing until you are comfortable doing so.
• DO block abusers: FaithMate.com STRONGLY encourages you to block any member who behaves in an abusive manner and to report the behavior to FaithMate.com. You can block users and report concerns directly from your profile or theirs.
• DO trust your gut: Immediately quit IMing when you feel unsure or threatened.
• Do keep a record of your conversations. If you are uncomfortable with an IM exchange, remember to click the “Save to file” link on your IM window. FaithMate.com does not keep a record of your IMs.

See below for more great tips to ensure your safety on and off the information super highway.

Finding a loving, faithful long-term relationship is possible online. FaithMate.com offers a fun, safe environment that gives YOU control over your dating experience and allows you to progress at your own pace in order to establish a healthy relationship—whether it’s just a casual friendship or a passionate, lasting romance.

Keeping in mind that to grow any relationship you have to give a little to get a little, we also want you to exercise caution. Don’t be afraid to make connections. With a little caution and common sense you should be able to avoid meeting people that are untrustworthy.

 

 

Three Ways to construct a superior Dating Profile:

Profile Tips that will improve your results!

The competition for attention on online dating services is fierce. So fierce, in fact, that some people resort to lying or posting outdated photos to try and attract attention.
It’s critical that you are honest when you create your profile and with your photos so that you don’t meet (or interact) with others under false pretenses.
So then what are some important things you can do to build a better profile? Here are three specific profile tips you can use to improve your profile right now.

1) Avoid Negativity

We’ve all experienced a first date where the person we are with complained about their work, finances and they’re life in general. This kind of negativity is a major turnoff. The same is true with your profile. Nothing turns off a reader like negative talk. On the other hand being positive is like a magnet.

Here’s how one person started her profile:

“To be quite honest, I have been putting this off as long as possible. I have friends who use Match and have had some terrible dates.”

It makes you wonder, “what is she doing here?” Now compare that to this introduction:

“I’ve heard online dating is a great way to meet awesome people and that’s why I want to meet you.”

Which one of these profile intros is more attractive? The one who wants to date “losers” or the one that wants to date “winners”? Psychologically everyone wants to be a winner. Therefore in your profile, avoid anything negative like the plague. Be positive.
If you have anything negative in your profile (“I hate country music,” “the last guy I dated was a liar and cheater,” “I’m sick of being alone,” “I’m sick of the bar scene,” etc.) then go edit it out immediately and replace it with something positive (“I love independent music and artists, like…”). Always be positive; not just in your profile, but also in life.

2) Go From Usual to Unique

Read this profile and tell me if you recognize it:

“I am a fun person who loves movies and music. I like walks on the beach, good conversation, and dining out. I’m looking for someone who is fun and can make me laugh.”
Unfortunately, the above describes most profiles – typical and non-informative. Beef up your profile to be more descriptive and unique. Instead of “I like movies,” say “my favorite movie is ____ because _______” or use a movie character to describe you. “I’m a lot like _____ in ______ because _______.”

Use clever words that are descriptive. Instead of saying “on hot days I like to go to the ocean or on a hike,” say, “on a sizzling day my adventurous side leads me to traversing the ocean on a sailboat or discovering a new waterfall that I can cool off under.”
Instead of “I like to discover new things,” say, “I’m a lot like Indiana Jones in that I love exploring the mysteries of life, while educating my mind to appreciate new things.”
Strive to make your profile unordinary by spicing it up sentence by sentence. Be descriptive, unique, and fun!

3) Filter Out People You Don’t Want to Attract

Your profile isn’t about getting responses. It is about getting responses from the type of person you are attracted to. Therefore, use descriptions to help narrow your focus to what you want so that you get responses from who you’re looking for.

Instead of “I’m looking for someone fun and humorous,” say, “I’m looking for a lighthearted man between the ages of 24 and 29 who enjoys the humorous side of life. If you are clean-shaven and can hold a conversation during a 150 mile car journey, then we may be a match. Email me.”
In the above example, you created three filters – an age filter (24 and 29), and appearance filter (clean-shaven) and a communication filter (good-communicator). And you did it without offending. But you also created a response filter (“…we may be a match. Email me.”) You’ve helped tell the person what the next step is if they meet your criteria. You’ve created a call to action, which will help direct interested parties to email you versus waiting.

****Bonus Tip****

Change your header message and main photo often. It keeps it fresh and interesting for people doing searches and increases the chances of it being viewed. Be creative.
A great way to make your profile better is to analyze profiles you really like. What is it that you like about them? What makes the profiles different?

Now what will you do to make your profile different?